I'mma Let You Finish, But Kwalified is One of the Dopest Rap Names of All-Time

Last week I asked what song you’d sing on an American Idol audition, to which I received some great answers, including Skot’s CD-winning-worthy tune from Les Miserables (Hit me up for your choices, Skotty). This week, I think the question is easily as awesome… or even awesomer!

In light of the review I posted earlier today, I thought to myself,

Self, if you were a dope master of the ceremonies like Kevin “Kwalified” Richie, what would your name be?

A truly interesting question, I found myself with many options, some that were quite fly and others that would not fly at all. I mean, think of all the great names that my favorite MCs go by: Beefy, Mos Def, Pigeon John, Uno Mas, Blackthought, CookBook, MC Frontalot, thekeenone… but what to name myself?

First, I thought,

What about “MCJC”, I mean Justin Charles… JC… ah, I guess that sucks. Oh, I know, I could make it a play on one of my favorite MCs, like I could “Dos Mas” or even better yet “Whitethought”… no wait, that sounds like a white supremacist rapper, if there is such a thing.

I realized that as creative as I thought I was, I wasn’t. In fact, the name I chose was the easiest of all… and a name that my wife’s grandpop came up with to begin with… so here it is (stand in awe of my wit and wisdom!): “thepaintedman”.

HA! I am awesome. So, now it’s your turn. What would your rap name be?

My favorite answer gets a Hip Hop prizepack. Word?



~ by thepaintedman on January 19, 2010.

10 Responses to “I'mma Let You Finish, But Kwalified is One of the Dopest Rap Names of All-Time”

  1. my rap name that i came up with a few years ago is felonious monk. some day i’ll actually record something under that name… for a producer/ dj i came up with saint beats, but i’ve just been using the nemesis for remixes.
    i’ve been meaning to ask for a while what the story behind “the painted man” is.

  2. I’ll have to blog about that sometime.

    I did a killer industrial remix of “Ice Ice Baby” in college under the moniker “Brand Loyalty” but I can’t seem to find it anywhere…

  3. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Justin Harlan, Justin Harlan. Justin Harlan said: Can you be as awesome as @KwalifiedEmcee , @beefyness , @mc_frontalot , or @dothepigeon ? http://trunc.it/4um1e […]

  4. I’ve discussed this at length with friends in the past. My rap name would be Deuce Master Flex (A.K.A. DMF). I have irritable bowel. Get it?


  5. I’m gonnna go with “Ska-T” for three reasons.

    1. I would only sample traditional ska bands such as The Specials and Madness.

    2. It is my name… but spelled even more different that it is already spelled.

    3. My last name is Rudy. I don’t think I could have a more perfect last name for being related to ska.

  6. i hate to be critical… but the specials and madness aren’t really traditional ska bands, they’re two tone. traditional ska is more like desmond dekker and the skatalites.

  7. I accept that. I tend to lump ska into only two large categories (traditional and the new stuff that is more punk/rock with trumpets), although I realize there are way more subcategories… I’m just too lazy to subcategorize all that much.

    By the way… Felonious Monk definitely has my vote.

  8. Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by thepaintedman: Can you be as awesome as @KwalifiedEmcee , @beefyness , @mc_frontalot , or @dothepigeon ? http://trunc.it/4um1e

  9. yeah, they’re definitely more traditional than, say, the mighty mighty bosstones or reel big fish. when i first got into ska, i thought it was just punk with horns. i saw the skatalites live and it didn’t even occur to me that they were ska, i thought it was like jamaican swing!

    and thanks!

  10. […] question was one of my favorite ones yet. And Lost delivered the best answer with his hip hop name, Deuce Master Flex (DMF), noting that the name came in part due to his IBS. I actually think the name Lost would be a hot […]

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